Pupils have a lot of things to do in the afternoon. Some join a volunteering program and some prefer to hang out with their friends.My friends prefer to hang out,  play football and basketball, go to the cinima and watch movies.

I love to hang up with my friends in all those places but (I) also volunteer in the police because I love to help  people and I love the excitement in this job. It's very challenging and fun at the same time.The volunteering provides me the excitement in my life and provides me a job in my spare time.

In addition, I do the volunteering because I want to make a change where I live, to do someting good for the people in my city, provide protection to them from all the dangerous people who want to hurt them or other(phr.).I feel that the police can protect me and I want to message it to(phr.) all the people in the city.

In conclusion, I think that to(מיותר) volunteer(ing) and to(מיותר) hang(ing) up with my friends make my life very enjoyable, I love to them both. But I think that the volnteering is much more importent(sp. - important), its(gr. - it) helps you and in(ww. - at) the same time helps the others, to make their lives more enjoyable and more protected. It's not about you, it's about the other(s), about the peopel(sp.) you care about the most, your family and your friends. 


Much better. Well done!
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Daphna